Originally aired
December 08,
1998
Written by: Marti Noxon
Teaser
FADE UP:
EXT. PARK - DAY
As we move through a wooded park area -- and land on A PAIR OF TRUNK-LIKE, NOT QUITE HUMAN LEGS.
 |
Now we PAN UP the legs and see BUFFY'S FEET DANGLING, kicking. In a moment we get the whole picture - Buffy is in the IRON GRIP of A HUGE, HIDEOUS DEMON. He's got her by the neck, and she's flailing - gasping. |
ANGLE: XANDER
Is picking himself painfully up, obviously reeling from a blow.
WILLOW
Rifles through Buffy's weapon bag nearby - frantic.
WILLOW
Oh, God, Oh, God - Demon, demon -
what kills a demon?!
BUFFY
Hears this - tries to talk, unsuccessfully.
BUFFY
Knurrppppph!
ON WILLOW
WILLOW
Oh! Nurf? Not nurf! Knife!
Willow snatches a ceremonial KNIFE from the bag. She TOSSES it to Buffy - who catches it and THRUSTS it into the demon's belly. The demon BELLOWS AND DIES. Both he and Buffy fall to the ground with a painful THUD.
A long BEAT as they re-group. Xander and Willow move to Buffy - help her to her feet.
BUFFY
Okay. That was too close for
comfort. Not that slaying is ever comfy...
(then)
But you know what I mean. If you
guys hadn't been here to help-
WILLOW
(shaken)
But we were. And we did. And we're all fine.
(re: demon)
Isn't he gonna go poof?
BUFFY
I guess these guys don't. We'll have
to bury him or something. Makes you
appreciate vampires. No muss, no fuss.
XANDER
How come Faith was a no show? I thought
the mucussy demons were her favorites.
BUFFY
Couldn't reach her -- again. She hasn't
been hanging out much. Off by herself.
XANDER
I detect worry.
BUFFY
Little bit. Slaying's a hard gig --
too much alone time isn't always
healthy. Stuff gets pent up.
WILLOW
We should try to do more socializing with her.
XANDER
Well, burial detail aside, does this
cap us off for the day?
BUFFY
You got plans?
XANDER
I cannot stress enough how much I
don't have plans.
BUFFY
No luck reaching Cordelia?
XANDER
I left a few messages, sixty or seventy...
(suddenly soapboxy)
And you know what bugs me? Okay, we
were kissing, it's wrong, but I know
that was positively the last time we
ever would have kissed.
WILLOW
Darn tootin'.
XANDER
And they burst in, rescuing us
without even knocking, I mean this is
really all their fault.
The girls look at him.
BUFFY
Your logic does not resemble our Earth-logic.
XANDER
(sheepishly)
Mine is more advanced.
WILLOW
At least tomorrow's Monday. Another school day.
BUFFY
That's right. Focus on school.
Focus on yourself. That's the strong
Willow way to heal.
WILLOW
Actually -- I was more thinking "Oz
will be there and I can beg for forgiveness."
BUFFY
That works too.
WILLOW
I want to be strong Willow. But then
when I think I might not ever get to
be close to Oz again... it's like all
the air goes out of the room.
BUFFY
I know the feeling.
They rise. Buffy grabs the demon's legs. Her friends immediately flank her, ready to help drag him off.
XANDER
Right. You've been through it all
with Angel and you're still standing.
So, tell us, wise one, how do you deal?
She contemplates. Then, simply --
BUFFY
I have you guys.
They start to drag him off toward the bushes.
INT. CORDELIA'S BEDROOM - NIGHT
CLOSE ON
 |
A PHOTOGRAPH OF XANDER, WILLOW, BUFFY and CORDELIA - as a large pair of SCISSORS come into frame and cuts each one out, separating them. |
 |
In the background we can hear XANDER'S voice on an answering machine. |
XANDER (O.C.)
Hey. It's Xander. If you get this, call me.
Now we MOVE UP to see that it's CORDELIA who is doing the slice and dice job while she ignores the phone machine. Her eyes are red from crying and she looks just about as bad as an incredibly beautiful person can look.
XANDER (O.C.)
(new message)
Hi. Xander... I, uh, well, I'm in if
you feel like talking. Bye.
 |
Now we WIDEN and see that she's wearing sweats and a sports top - and a LARGE WHITE BANDAGE that spans one side of her torso, covering the injury she sustained in episode 8. We also see that her ROOM is a TOTAL MESS. Littered with clothes and diet soda cans and junk food wrappers... |
She slices the heads off Buffy and Willow.
XANDER (O.C.)
(new message)
Hi, Cordelia.... Uh....
Now Cordy takes the Xander portion and LIGHTS it on fire with a match. She drops it into an ashtray - watches the FUMES RISING - her expression betraying the chilling mix of hurt and fury that is unmistakably the look of a woman scorned.
CLOSE ON PHOTO
As XANDER, BUFFY & WILLOW'S faces shrivel and burn.
XANDER (O.C.)
(new message)
If you get the chance... if we can
talk... I'm here...
BLACKOUT.
END OF TEASER
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